Coach Joi 
Are you Prepared to do your Part of the Forgiveness Process? Many women have been pressured by their abusive husband, family and clergy to forgive, forget and move on as though the impacts of abuse can be put in the past by a practice of forgiveness. These women are often still in the throes of … Read more
The Harmful Phrases that Keep Being Said Of all the platforms or soapboxes I’ve stood on over the decades of working in this field, victim blaming is by far the most important to me as an educator, therapist, coach, or as a human being walking alongside other human beings who are abused. A victim of … Read more
Do we understand the subtle and insidiousness of this behavior? This past week on Instagram Live we opened the discussion of coercive control. In this week’s blog post, we’ll unpack this with more depth to really understand the behavior and how it can be seen in the greater understanding of domestic abuse. Domestic Abuse Laws … Read more
In our last post we discussed Infidelity Abuse from a spiritual lens. In this follow up post, we will continue our processing from a costs-based perspective. As I did last time, there will be a spiritual component to this post alongside neurobiology. Turning the Hearts In the Old Testament the promise of Malachi speaks of … Read more
Acknowledging All the Pain As a social scientist and human behaviorist, I don’t often write blogs from a faith-based perspective, but it feels like the right time to address this topic in this light. I am not going to mince words as I write this post. If a more spiritual topic is not right for … Read more
What it is. What it isn’t, and why we need to get clear on this topic. Consent Defined According to Webster’s 1828 Dictionary – Consent is an agreement of the mind. He further states, “We generally use this word in cases where power, rights, and claims are concerned. We give consent when we yield that … Read more
The Law of Abundance I have dedicated my life’s work to helping people understand the relational debt that we carry with one another. Our social-relational obligations are quite significant. We can bless or injure one another in each interaction that we have. Unfortunately, we are experiencing a season of social-economic existence where personal responsibility to … Read more
Victim Blaming Tactics How tragic is it to live in a world where social slander is an accepted method of communication? This type of behavior stems from – in this author’s opinion – the lack of social regard we have for one another, coupled with an attitude of behavioral relativism. In this post we are … Read more
It is not what we’ve been taught After decades of abuse, I have had plenty of experiences with painful memories and reliving the sensations of the initial abuse event. There are places that can be difficult to drive by because of the abuse that occurred there. In the past, we’ve called these recurring trauma events, … Read more
The more I work in this field, the more I see the insidious victim blaming that is occurring in the societal narrative, the words of abusive men, and even the so-called mental health helpers in the field. If I am to leave a critical message to the those working in this field, the most crucial … Read more
